Merthur and Brolin Recommended FanFiction Masterpost.
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Merthur:
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Modern AU:
The Student Prince [podfic]: SO GOOD. ALL THE TIME GOOD. It is one of the best.
Second star on the right and straight on ‘till morning. Another stupid adventure. Come and be king of the world?
Not In This Land Alone [podfic]: Sweet, really sweet. It’s lovely.
“Don’t say the King,” Arthur begged, “I’m tired of people telling me that things can’t happen or must happen because I’m the King. Who says a king can’t have a scrawny, magic boyfriend if he wants one?”
Coffeeshop Muffins: FLUFFY. AND ADORABLE AND JUST AMAZING.
Arthur and Merlin were the kind of couple who would go into a coffee shop and get free muffins for being so sickeningly adorable.
We Make The Hipsters Fall In Love: PORN. Because I love every Hipster!Merlin fic.
Arthur can’t believe Merlin actually exists. He wears horrible thick hipster glasses and a button-up in a color which makes Arthur suspect he found it at the back of a sale rack and a belt with a bedazzled buckle and is clearly an alien or a vivid hallucination.
World Enough and Time: THIS FIC IS FUCKING FLAWLESS AND GORGEOUS.
Arthur had it all figured out. And then Merlin shot him in Beijing.
Numbers and Figures: This is upsetting, but worth it.
The wave of panic that washed through Merlin at that very moment would stay with him for a long time: the sudden realization that the natural order of the world was now upside down, inverted, wrong.
looking at me looking at you: I FUCKING CAN’T EVEN. THIS FIC. I CAN’T. IT’S JUST. I CAN’T.
Before Arthur, he’d never known someone so lovable could feel so unloved. Before Arthur, Merlin didn’t know a person could care for another so much that sometimes it felt like he might die at the enormity of it.
Pianos Are Made for Falling: All the feelings, all the time. It’s beautiful. But heartbreaking.
Some days, he believed he could live without Arthur because he had done it before. Other days, he wasn’t so sure.
The Good Times Are Killing Me: OH GOD, angst, anger, hurt and then porn.
People are full of inconsistencies, he thinks wildly. They grip your wrist tightly enough to bruise with the same fingers that had curled tenderly over your hipbone. They say cold and brutal things with the mouth that had pressed, gentle, against your neck. They tell you it’s over after they had lain in bed with you, sunlight soft on their spine, murmuring plans for the rest of your life together into your ear.
Drastically Redefining Protocol & Wedding [podfic]: LKSJDFLASK;DJFLADSKJ SO GOOD!
Arthur’s mouth went dry at that, his vision blurred. “I love him,” he admitted, because he did, and if he had the courage to say it to his father maybe he’d have the courage to say it to Merlin soon—eventually—some day possibly before they died.
A Binding Contract: This is an amazingly written, flawlessly done, hot fic. I adore it.
His entire body felt like it was on fire, the heat coming off of him even warming the metal around his wrist.
Crash Into Me: It’s cute and funny and adorable and has a ton of pining in it and it’s good and sex also.
For a moment he lets himself consider reaching over and twining their fingers together; he doesn’t though, and the moment passes.
Possibly Maybe I’m Falling for You: Because Adorable!Arthur, Awkward!Merlin and Gwaine is such a parent.
“You’re Merlin, and you’re my best mate. And apparently your name is quite apt. Now, how about you calm down and stop worrying that I’m going to press-gang you into being my secret magical bodyguard.”
the reason that i laugh and breathe: BECAUSE IT IS FLAWLESS AND ADORABLE AND FLUFFY AND EVERYTHING.
“Merlin’s not my best friend.” And immediately after he said it, Arthur knew he was wrong, completely and utterly and stupidly wrong. “It’s your fault, anyway, you’re the one who first decided that you were too lesbian to date me, and then introduced me to Merlin.”
Our Ungodly Hour: Because I’m a sucker for Abused!Merlin and Caring!Arthur.
“Merlin, are you alright?” He hoped Merlin didn’t hear the way his throat had tightened or the dread that constricted it. ”No.” The short, simple response was enough to galvanize Arthur into action and he sprung from his nice warm bed and quickly dressed, toeing on shoes and grabbing a jacket.
All I Want For Christmas (Is You): It’s okay to read this anytime of the year, that’s how fluffy and everything it is.
Merlin continues to mostly ignore him for the rest of the week, and Arthur is torn between apologizing and demanding that Merlin pay attention to him. In the end he does neither, and when he finally leaves the office on Friday evening Merlin has long since gone home.
Same River Twice: This is heartwarming and good and Italy! and I have a thing for openly gay/bisexual princes/kings. AND LEON. Because I love Leon.
He glances over at Merlin’s castle again and sighs. Talk about escaping fate.
Five Days In New York: A classic, really. BUT SO FLUFFY AND ADORABLE AND EVERYTHING.
You’re the only thing that makes me whole. The only sure thing I know. I’m so lucky I found you.
What Looks Like Crazy [podfic]: Sweet, milidly upsetting, but really, really touching and good.
And Merlin can almost see the wall going up brick by brick and Arthur disappearing behind it. He tries not to feel disappointed, fails miserably, gives Arthur a tight-lipped smile.
The Pendragon Guide to How Not to Date [podfic]: IT’S FUNNY AND ADORABLE.
Merlin nodded, smiling slightly. He had only stayed to tell the bartender that he was being a bastard, and apparently, that was unnecessary, he sighed and put a fiver down on the bar. Merlin’s eyebrows shot up his forehead.
Easy There [podfic]: Awkward boys and their awkward feelings and awkwardness and rowing, also. A lot of rowing.
If anything called for one of their spectacularly awkward shows of public affection, Merlin thought it was probably this. He overbalanced and jerked oddly and almost hit Lancelot in the face as he twisted to stay upright, and Arthur reached out to balance him, hands warm against Merlin’s waist.”Steady on, Emrys,” he whispered.”Yeah, Merlin,” said Lancelot. He had that elated look on his face that meant one of his many prayers for cheesy openings had been answered in the very recent past. “Easy, there.”
In Love With My Radio: Because Oblivious!Merlin, it’s fucking funny, Arthur sounds like Hagrid, AND LEON (because I love him). IT’S FLAWLESS AND ADORABLE AND SWEET AND FLUFFY AND ;LDSAKJFALS;KDFJASDF.
“You,” Merlin glared, incensed. Arthur’s blue eyes blinked at him, utterly perplexed and looking lost. “You are an incredibly rude arse.” He stomped down hard on Arthur’s trainers (didn’t Lance have a pair like that?) and stalked off home, furious.
You Be My Companion, I’ll Be Your Doctor: BECAUSE OF DOCTOR WHO AND ARTHUR IS ADORABLE AND MERLIN IS OBSESSED WITH DOCTOR WHO.
“It’s Saturday, you prat. Doctor Who night.” Honestly, Merlin did love him, but he was a bit thick at times (read: all the time).
Heartbreak, Secret Friends and Stupid Doodles: SO ADORABLE AND FLUFFY AND SWEET AND ADORABLE AND yeah.
I know you said you didn’t want to meet, but that’s too bad. You’ve already made me fall for you, now you have to take responsibility.
Two Weeks Notice [podfic]: It’s kinda sweet and a little funny and it’s very well written, also.
“I’ve lost him, Gwen.” Merlin didn’t bother to mention the insanity of losing someone he was planning to leave in the first place, but thankfully Gwen didn’t mention it, either. “Don’t say that, Merlin,” Gwen replied, ever hopeful. “What’s that UniKORN slogan you and Lance are always spouting off about? Nothing’s ever really lost as long as there’s someone left who’s willing to fight.”
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Canon Era:
In Time Of Trial [podfic]: This is amazing, it really, really is.
It sounded like Arthur. But that was impossible. Arthur was dead.
Pavlov Penis [podfic]: I really love this one, it’s very good and all the things.
Arthur’s chambers feel awkward when he’s not there, but it’s the kind of awkward Merlin feels at home in.
Affairs of State: It’s cute and funny.
After that the entire kingdom let out a collective sigh of relief, and everyone, the four involved in the affair included was happier for it.Forbærnen: PORN, MAN.
But this expression, this smile, the one he gives when he’s doing magic in the dark of the wood leaves Arthur breathless and aching and oddly angry.
We Cannot Live Unbruised: From Leon’s perspective, IT IS AMAZING.
Merlin’s magic had fast become the kingdom’s worst kept secret. The knights knew and Arthur knew and Merlin knew Arthur knew but they never discussed it, at least, in Leon’s presence.
All The Laughter From Before [podfic]: OH GOD. It’s sad, but it gets better.
It has taken Merlin’s death to turn Arthur into something colder, more determined, but Morgana can admit to herself that she’s known it was there.
Red Silk & By A Thread [podfic] & Never To Burn [podfic]: Very well written.
Arthur has never felt this dizzy or awful in his life. It isn’t like real pain, not the kind of pain that makes sense. It hurts places he can’t describe or reach.
An Unshakable Desire: Also, mostly porn. But it’s sweet. Sort of.
It still bothered him sometimes, that his desire for Merlin seemed unabated, that it was perhaps even deepening into other emotions that Arthur dared not name.
All The Ways I Love You: It’s fluffy and adorable and makes my heart hurt with it’s love and shit.
The five thousand and sixth time Arthur told Merlin he loved him, it was a blissful reassurance to the man he loved.
All The King’s Horses And All The King’s Men: Pretty good, it’s still a work-in-progress.
I don’t deserve this, Arthur (thirty seven).
Four Times Merlin Cock-Blocked Arthur, and One Time He Didn’t [podfic]: FLAWLESS PORN.
The second time, well, it’s not planned or anything; it’s not like he was waiting for the opportunity, no matter what Arthur says. It just happens.
Who’s Counting Anyways? [podfic]: It’s funny and good and yeah and plus sex again.
Merlin’s not quite sure how this game started, but he can see exactly where it’s going. It was only small things at first, easily pretended away – accidental touches that began to linger, gazes that caught and held too long.
One For Sorrow: Sweet and fluffy and maybe just a little angsty.
“One for sorrow.” The old man said. “One for sorrow.” The young woman whispered. “One for sorrow?” The small boy asked, his eyes wide and blue as they stared up at his mother.
The Unbroken Thread [podfic]: It’s kinda amazing and really, pretty interesting also. But good.
Arthur would like to think that by the time Merlin becomes his manservant, he has already gotten used to it.
Truth Is A Whisper [podfic] & Ten Weeks: AGH. GOOD. REALLY GOOD.
Half-opening his eyes, Merlin kneels between muscular thighs and pushes inside, breathing out “God, Arthur,” as he slides home, and may his mother never hear of this, it’s three entire strokes before he realizes the man beneath him is not, in fact, Arthur.
Four Things One Should Know About Merlin (and One Thing Nobody Knows About Arthur): A little bit of a classic. For a reason, it’s just lksajal;ksjasdlfkj yes.
“Merlin. It’s good,” Arthur says sincerely, and that’s all Merlin needs, judging by the smile that spreads across his face like the dawn of a new day.
Fools Of Us All [podfic]: IT’S AMAZING BECAUSE EVERYONE LOVES MERLIN.
Arthur moved in closer, their faces just a hair’s breadth apart, and closed a palm over Merlin’s cheek. “This means I’m going to kiss the ever living hell out of you, and you’re going to like it, Merlin, because I fucking love you, you absolute clot.”
If You’ll Be My Star, I’ll Be Your Sky [podfic]: SWEET. And a little angsty, but mostly sweet and endearing.
Arthur believes in the merit of hard work, of duty- Merlin suspects Arthur would believe magic would be cutting corners, somehow, even though he expects the impossible.
Seven Magpies [podfic]: Sweet, and adorable and intresting, with a proper plot and everything.
Arthur also knew he would never forget the sound that Merlin made when Arthur slid into him, a rumble that sounded as if it came from somewhere low in Merlin’s throat and seemed to say,I give you permission to call me yours the way I call you mine.
Crown of the Summer Court [podfic]: It’s got a really intresting plot, and sex. Which is good. And it’s sweet.
“And you’ll be my king?” Arthur said, meaning to sound skeptical about it; but privately he felt a deep, possessive satisfaction in the thought: Merlin always by his side, in any kingdom, in any world and time.
Quickening Days [podfic]: It’s good, with a nice plot and it’s sweet and adorable towards the end.
Merlin didn’t reply, but the pace of his words changed and the stars spilled out of their familiar patterns and began to spin around each other in a dance that was so soothing as to be soporific. Arthur closed his eyes and listened to Merlin creating magic beside him and his last thought before sleep claimed him was: I am safe, and I am home.
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Brolin:
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Half-Full: Because you really can’t go wrong with porn Brolin.
They’ve all been out to a bar for someone on the crew’s birthday, and he and Colin are both kind of drunk and as usual the last ones standing. Or not standing, so much, because they’re in Bradley’s hotel room, sprawled on opposite ends of the sofa, nursing two beers and for some reason that Bradley can’t remember, throwing M&Ms at each other.
If We Sleep Together (Will You Be My Best Friend Forever) & Love Made Visible: THE MOST ADORABLE FLAWLESS BROLIN FICS EVER.
Colin doesn’t know when he fell in love with Bradley just that somewhere along the way he did, completely and totally and without any reserve.
What They Want: BECAUSE I’M ASEXUAL AND THIS IS AMAZING.
It’s amazing how much this thing with Colin has changed him.
Maybe The Seaside Is The Place: This is just sdljas;lkfjsaldfkj. The only way to describe it. alksdjfoisadnfasd.
If you’re going to break a heart, maybe the seaside is the place to do it, Colin thinks.
The Colour of Cartoon Sunshine: BECAUSE AWKWARD COLIN FICS ARE THE BEST.
He focuses on breathing, tries to pick comforted or disquieted but can’t, and so he just stares at Bradley in the dark. Up close he seems vaguely unreal, like a black and white photo, his eyes too big to belong to anything but a cartoon character and his lips too perfect to be made of actual flesh. When he’s moving, talking, laughing, he’s a compelling frenzy, and actually it’s strange to see him be so still.
Love, Livejournal, and Other Sins: Because Bradley is a fangirl and apparently, gay.
“Locked myself out.” “Fuck, you’re an idiot. Hold on.” “Hurry up, I’m kiiiiinda naked.” “…Jesus.”
How To Woo Your Co-Star in 5 Songs or Less: BROLIN ALL THE THINGS. This. Is. Flawless.
“Colin!” Bradley says loudly, bursting into their trailer, “Colin, I have a song to sing for you!”.
The Air Between Them: BROLIN. So very good.
Colin sighs and all of the anger drains from him, leaves him looking sad and defeated. “Don’t you get it?” he asks quietly. “I love you, you bastard.”
Five Times Colin Fell In Love With Bradley (the Bradley James Version): SO SWEET AND ADORABLE AND FLUFFY AND YES I CAN’T EVEN BECAUSE JUST YES.
“Hi, I’m Bradley James. Pleased to meet you.”And then sparks didn’t matter so much anymore, because they had fireworks.
Teaching The Indie Kids To Joust Again & Epilogue [podfic]: It’s really good. And clearly, both Colin and Bradley also ships Merthur, also good. A little angsty and boy awkwardness, but it’s okay at the end.
It’s the first day of shooting for the latest episode, which is (of course) so ridiculously homoerotic you could replace all the chain mail with neon pink spangles and no one would even notice.
How To Fight Loneliness: OH GOD, the angst. Eating disorders and everything and just agh, it’s beautiful.
“You’re just going to have to trust me on this one, Col, when I say that it’s the biggest of deals. I don’t want to scare you, or make you embarrassed, but all I can feel when I touch you is bones, and I’m scared to turn away from you for even a second in case you disappear.
While You and Me We Hold and Lean: ADORABLE. Awkward boys and feelings and cuddling and naps, all by accident, of course.
Sleep comes easily with the warm and comforting weight of Colin pressed along the length of Bradley’s body.
One Star Fell And Another: Jesus. Colin and fanfiction, and then sex. A lot of sex, really.
Colin has to clamp his jaw hard against the hysterical giggle bubbling in the back of his throat. “How was I supposed to tell you?” he demands. “Hello Bradley, you’re looking fit today. Would you like to read this story I wrote in which our characters have filthy sex on Uther’s throne?”
Merlin never had any idea.
As he climbed that hill, emerging on the other side, his bag light on his back, his smile soft on his face: he hadn’t a clue.
Walking down that path; pebbles beneath his shoes, crunching down, the sky long and blue and clear. Merlin would never have guessed.
Pushing past those brambles, feeling them scratch against his pale face, his destination finally in sight…
Merlin could never have imagined what Camelot held for him. Who it held for him.
He was just a young man, from an old village, with no intention in his heart to do anything other than be himself.
For now, he was alone, and carefree and weightless. In just a few hours, however, he would meet his other half; a man named Arthur.
And everything Merlin had thought he’d wanted, had thought he’d known, would be stripped from him in a flurry of fists, fire and destiny.
you asked for this anon, here you go: my brolin bookmarks in a post
(wow, you can put 750 link in one post actually)about my bookmarks:
the list is in no particular order and there might be some doubles (when a fic has been posted in more than one place, i usually save all of them, just in case one of them gets deleted)
you won’t find any death or non-con(between brolin) fics in here,
hardly any AU fics (cause i didn’t find any more)
and, if it gets NC-17, no bottom!bradley
okay, so now I’ve got AO3, I literally have fic ALL OVER THE PLACE. I’ll try and keep this updated, but I’m just trying to get sorted where everything is xD
I think most of these fics are also on tumblr (you’ll be linked to the ones that are, if you click on the Merthur/Morgwen/Gen headings) and they’re just some of the ones I have deemed long enough to repost elsewhere. There’s still a LOT more to post, and I hope to have all of them on FFnet, LJ AND AO3.
Basically, I have my work cut out for me, for the next year :s
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Against the Glass (NC-17): And obviously, Arthur would have a room with absolutely nothing in it, just because he could. Merlin’s eyebrows steadily rose, as he took in the sheer emptiness of it. Not a single piece of furniture, just an endless carpet and then, a sheet of glass. (LJ) (AO3)
Boxing Day (G): Many poorly paid workers were required to work on Christmas day and took the following day off to visit their families. As they prepared to leave, their employers would present them with Christmas boxes. (LJ) (AO3) (FFnet)
Nightshirts and Door Frames (R): “What’s this about, Arthur?” Merlin’s eyes were drawn towards a large wooden table, in the centre of the room, which definitely had not been there when he’d been cleaning yesterday. He took a few steps towards it, curiously, before suddenly stopping. At each of the four corners of the table, rested a leather strap, obviously made to bind around a person’s wrists and ankles. (LJ) (AO3) (FFnet)
Heady (PG): “You’re really going to ask her?” you ask, casual, indifferent. You’ve gotten so good at pretending, that you almost believe you don’t care anymore. But the heady pounding of your heart gives you away. (LJ) (AO3)
Check it in the Morning (G): I’d do anything for you. I’ll always be here, even if you turn against me. You might not think you need looking after, but trust me, you do. And I’ll be the one to take care of you. It’ll always be me. If the whole world left you, you wouldn’t be able to shake me from your side. You know that, Arthur? (LJ)
Throne Steps (PG): Merlin couldn’t sleep. Just when it had been starting to get better; just when he thought he could begin to shut his eyes at night again, even without the heat of Arthur at his side, everything had fallen apart. (LJ) (FFnet)
Love it when You Cry (R): “Merlin, why are you crying?” Arthur whispered, “did… did I… are you hurt?” he asked, uncertainly, crawling forwards slowly, eyes sweeping over Merlin’s gorgeous body, resting on the way his lips trembled, as he gasped.(LJ) (AO3)
Flexible (PG): Set after ‘Lamia’. Merlin has returned to Camelot, but Arthur cannot understand why his manservant hasn’t also returned to his usual, annoyingly over cheerful, state.(FFnet)
The Embrace, and Other Things (PG): A little collection of drabbles, inspired by the goings on in 406, A Servant of Two Masters.(FFnet)
Ribs and Ladders (PG): “Don’t send me away again, Arthur, I won’t go, don’t make me,” and suddenly Arthur was enfolding Merlin’s small frame with his own, immersing him and holding on tight, as he realised what Merlin’s nightmare was about.(FFnet)
Good to see you, too (PG): All the knight’s are so glad to see Merlin, they pull him into their arms, beaming and laughing. Arthur stands back, gives him space, and then claps a hand on his shoulder. This is why. Merthur, spoilers for series 4 episode 2. One shot, about 400 words.(FFnet)
Big and Blue (PG): Merthur, AU, in which Arthur turns up at Merlin’s flat in a rather huge blue coat. Fluffy stuffs.(FFnet)
I Gave Myself Away (PG-13): Gwen waits on the battlements every night for Morgana to save her. Based on the song ‘With or Without you’.(LJ) (A03) (FFnet)
What the Girls got up to in 404 (PG): Gwen’s given up hope, because Arthur’s affections OBVIOUSLY lie elsewhere. She turns to her old pal Morgana for help.(FFnet)
Gen:
Come Join the Circus of Sorcery (PG-13): Aaron spat into Merlin’s bruised face while he spoke, “your Prince isn’t here now, Emrys. Show us what you can do.” Merlin looked at the sea of sorcerers, feeling the magic build, furiously, behind his eyes. “Back away,” he growled, raising his hands. (FFnet)
Arthur Pendragon: Lost and found (WIP, PG-13): Merlin closed his eyes, listening to the jeers of the other boys urging Arthur on: “Push him! Push him!”. The lake shone brightly behind Merlin, who could only wait for the blow which would force him backwards into its cold depths. AU fic. Details inside. (FFnet)
Six Months (G): Morgana has been gone for six months. A fic in which Gwen is lonely, Merlin is sweet, the castle is cold, and Arthur understands. (FFnet)
Tripped (PG): Merlin carries Arthur’s armour. And then Merlin falls. So, what will Arthur do when his servant lies at the foot of the staircase, his smile wiped from his face from tripping over that top step and then tumbling to the bottom? (FFnet)
That’s one Arthur too Many (PG-13): “Arthur, what’s going on?” Merlin asked his master, his eyes wide with terror “What have I done?” “Don’t worry Merlin,” Arthur called, but all he could think of was the rise and fall of the glittering whip. He didn’t see Merlin’s eyes flash suddenly gold. (FFnet)
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And, just the links:
OMG CEE. This is so much. Okay, if you already aren’t following Cee, you need to because she’s a merthur goddess. Her fics evoke SO MUCH EMOTION. I end up laughing hysterically or fucking crying because her angst is just that. Pure angst.
I’ve been wanting to make one of these for a while, and I was feeling inspired tonight, so consider this my late Christmas gift to you. Note: I am unashamedly addicted to all forms of hurt/comfort, angst, death!fic, and modern au’s. Just warning you now.
Four Things One Should Know About Merlin (And One Thing No One Knows About Arthur)
My Thoughts: So very very sweet. I loved reading Arthur’s thoughts about Merlin and how Arthur couldn’t help but loving him even for all his faults.
My Thoughts: Short, but incredibly hot. PWP
My Thoughts: This. This is so many levels of perfect. I am frankly a little incoherent with the adorableness that IS this fic. Hipster!Merlin, Jock!Arthur who sort of stalks Merlin because he thinks he is adorable is so many levels of perfect. Neither of them having ever been with a man but still following their heart. I. Love. It.
My Thoughts: Arthur and Merlin finding love through fridge magnets. So cute!
My Thoughts: Uni AU. Just go read it. Right now.
My Thoughts: This story made me wish I was Merlin and had a secret Arthur sending me gifts. Very adorable, and music obsessed Merlin and secretly in love Arthur is perfect.
My Thoughts: Very well thought out, the progression of their relationship is very believable and sweet and I loved all the tension involved in the business side of the story.
My Thoughts: Merlin is a pro-swimmer, Arthur is the Prince of Wales. I love that Arthur and Merlin both have their insecure moments yet still manage to get over themselves and find each other.
My Thoughts: A very amusing take on Uther, and Arthur groveling at Merlin’s feet is always hilarious.
No Business Like Show Business
My Thoughts: Merlin and Arthur are VA for a teens cartoon about gay dragons and communicate through post-its on the recording studio wall. If you have not read this yet, your life is not complete. Go read now!! Enjoy the fluff and love!!!
My Thoughts: I was smiling through this entire fic. I loved it so much. Arthur as a famous Merthur fanfic writer, Merlin as his Beta. They are so so perfect.
Drastically Redefining Protocol
My Thoughts: Prince Arthur and Commoner Merlin. Perfect always.
My Thoughts: If you have not read this yet, I don’t even know what to say to you. Drop everything and go read it now.
At Our Best When It’s From the Hips
My Thoughts: A very hot and very interesting take on Merlin and Arthur’s sexuality.
My Thoughts: Arthur thinks he is hot stuff as an up and coming rock star, Merlin is a techie who can’t be bothered to care. Short and sweet.
A very “short” list of recs coming from my very short time in the fandom. But so far, I feel every single one of these fics are a must read. :)
Arthur’s sorry for many things. He’s sorry for the deaths caused by his father’s attitude towards magic. He’s sorry for tears and cries from the families that lost someone they dearly loved. He’s sorry for the war that happened. He’s sorry for the suffering that his half-sister, Morgana, must have felt.
But most of all, he’s sorry for the unsaid words he wanted to convey to his most loyal servant and friend, Merlin.
~*.*~
Dear Merlin,
I’m sorry I yell at you. I’m sorry I work you to the bone sometimes. I’m sorry I use you as an outlet for my frustration. I’m sorry I never thank you, when I know you sacrifice more for me than even I know.
I’m sorry I treat you like a slave sometimes.
We both know I don’t think of you as one, don’t we? Do you? Do you know how much I want you? How much it aches when I look at you sometimes, how much it overwhelms me to the point where I can either break down and beg, or shut off all emotion, protect my fragile heart with an insult about your intelligence? How much I need you, Merlin? How much I can’t bear to lose you?
I’m sorry I married her.
I put my duty over my feelings again. I made the choice which was for the best for Camelot, but which physically hurts me every time I see her face in the morning, realize, yet again, that it’s not you I’m waking up next to.
I’m sorry I love you.
And I’m sorry I will never be able to stop.
Yours,
Arthur.
_
The crumpled piece of torn parchment rests in the farthest corner of the king’s drawer. It will remain unseen, unknown, until the end of time.
Arthur watched Merlin go, his teeth chewing at the insides of his lips.
A few years ago, he might have forced Merlin to stay with him, because the boy behaved like a child, and was a damn idiot most of the time.
But things had changed: Merlin was no longer a boy and Arthur, so he liked to think, was no longer a prat. He… trusted Merlin. Sure, the servant sometimes acted a little shifty, and he had that infuriating smile which clearly said: “I know something you don’t,” but everyone was entitled to their secrets. Arthur only believed that Merlin kept nothing of importance from his King.
Now he saw Merlin dart away, and a sick, heavy worry, settled in his stomach. It was accompanied by something else, though; a thin layer of something which tasted suspiciously like pride, as it slid down his throat, to join the pit of nerves. It was this pride in Merlin, in the man he cared for more than any other, which allowed Arthur to duck his head, and turn on his heels, hurrying after the others.
One thing that the King could be certain about, despite his manservant’s possible lies, was that he would always return, even if every other man and woman dropped steadily out of his life, one by one.
Merlin would always be the one to remain.
Arthur wouldn’t have it any other way.
Canon-verse: Something Beautiful, A Chuisle, Still, Bringin’ up the baby, At Our Best When It’s From the Hips, All bets of, So That I Might Be Where You Are, Live to serve, A stranger in a strange land, Today is Tomorrow and Was Yesterday, ,Peach, Plum, Pear, Claustrophobic, Master And Slave, The Common Touch, A Long Road, Give In, Oh Sweet Surrender, Babe in the woods, The star to every wandering bark, The Road of Good Intentions Is a Two Way Street, Decisions, This Dark Road Will Lead Us Where We Want to Be, Aspects, 8x12x8, Pride and Prejudice, Untitled, Keep Your Secrets, The Easiest Thing, Polarity, Post hoc, ergo propter hoc, Waiting For the World to Fall, Doppelganger
Oh God, this was SO difficult.
»(you can find the modern one HERE )
Merlin came to a stop directly in front of the king. Arthur, who had been staring rather longingly at Percival, looked away and instead rested his eyes on his manservant.
For reasons beyond Merlin’s knowledge, Arthur refused to look at Merlin’s face. Worried, he asked what was bothering his king.
“I want to be more like them, Merlin.” Arthur answered, hurriedly gulping a mouthful of water as if his throat had gone dry.
Merlin knew what Arthur had meant, and he wanted it too, wanted to be more like them. He longed for the day when he could actively show his love for the king without being judged, thirsted for the time when they could finally be seen as lovers and none would show disgust.
But it wasn’t time yet, and this wasn’t that day.
A long pause invaded the conversation, stubbornly staying there as both parties were unsure of what to say. Every part of the feast was loud and lively save for Arthur, and to Merlin, nobody mattered but his king.
“Arthur, we can’t.” was the hardest thing Merlin had no pleasure in saying. Though saying what is was decidedly easy, living it was a whole different matter.
He watched as the king’s face fell, darkened with the thought of living a lie rather than the life they dreaded they might never have. Arthur glanced away, eyes still refusing to meet Merlin’s. And with what seemed like minutes, they stayed like that.
Silent.
Still.
“I know…” Arthur’s tone sucked all the warmth from Merlin’s body. And if Merlin thought that the king’s voice was the most heartbreaking he’d ever encountered, Arthur’s expression begged to differ. He looked hopeless and desperate, aged with old lines that weren’t actually there. The heart-wrenching expression was something Merlin frantically hoped he’d never have to see again. His soulless eyes finally greeted Merlin’s; the king’s lips were devoid of colour and vividity, as well as the other parts of his usually perfect face.
It was as if Arthur was breathing but wasn’t alive.
Merlin’s hand acted on its own accord, reaching for the heat of Arthur’s cheeks, somewhere the curve of his palm felt so at home. The king leaned in to it, eyes moist with a lively blue, and it felt like Arthur was living again.
Everyone turned their eyes to the king and his manservant, horrified and disgusted behind their masks.
If Merlin’s touch was what made Arthur feel alive, then he didn’t mind leaving it there for all to see.
Ahh, I’ve only recently started reading Merthur fics, so I don’t know that many good ones, YET. I’ll just list some of the ones that I’ve enjoyed and have bookmarked on my laptop at the moment. (Most are probably NC-17, sorry…)
to the world that never let you be
at our best when it’s from the hips
personal property of the court magician (do not borrow)
And it seems many will recommend The Student Prince. I haven’t gotten around to reading it yet!
Princess Mithian
“I can’t marry you, Merlin,” Arthur rounded on his manservant… no his friend…Arthur couldn’t keep up with their ever changing relationship anymore.
Merlin took a faltering step backwards, taken by surprise. He had only said it as a joke; a passing comment:
Well, if you can’t find anyone else to put up with your prattishness, you could always marry me.
“I was kidding,” Merlin exclaimed, arms flapping as he went traitorously red. Arthur blushed a little too, then, although he would never admit it, and sent Merlin on his way.
After that, Merlin couldn’t get the idea out of his head. It became his favourite daydream: Arthur waiting for him, at the end of an aisle, but not like he would have for Gwen. Merlin didn’t want that. There was nothing traditional, about a King marrying his manservant, and so Merlin didn’t care that he always pictured Arthur in the clothes he wore in his chambers: loose and comfortable, a shirt that was unlaced at the top, beige and hanging over his breeches.
Merlin would be wearing something reasonably fancy, because Arthur would insist upon it, and Gaius would walk him to where Arthur stood.
Once it was over, and they were wedded, Merlin would feel nothing but warmth, as the older man leaned in, to secure a kiss over his lips. Nothing but happiness, as it struck him that Arthur was his. He would wrap his arms around the King, and kiss him fiercely, hands fisted in his shirt, devotion in every flicker of his eyelids.
But now Arthur was standing, straight backed and noble, and a name, that didn’t belong to his manservant, was rolling from his tongue.
Princess Mithian.
Merlin felt his chest constrict, as his favourite dream stuttered, and then faded into nothing.
woodforthetrees submitted:
A head canon for you, that just vomited out of nowhere:
Merlin insisted on not exchanging presents for the holiday, because what could a servant afford that a king did not already have? Arthur was stubborn, though, and insisted on getting Merlin something. Merlin eventually gave in, but only on the condition that Arthur get him something practical, not something extravagant and pointless. Arthur had a fine cloak of deep blue velvet embroidered with gold thread made for him. It was the nicest piece of clothing Merlin had ever seen, and his eyes misted with tears when he opened it. Arthur was so busy watching Merlin play with the fabric between his fingers that he almost forgot to open Merlin’s present for him—an old book, the pages worn, filled with stories of adventure and dragons. A note tucked between the pages told Arthur that it had been Merlin’s only book as a child, and that he hoped Arthur enjoyed it as much as he had. Arthur didn’t try to hide the tears that came as he held the first real, thoughtful present he had received in his life.
